Twice in the last week I’ve decided to say no to say yes. To make room for something new and beautiful, I have to set some things aside — maybe temporarily, maybe forever.
I’m not a car person. I was perfectly happy with my 2005 Oldsmobile Alero. I picked that car because it showed the name of the song on the radio. Thats a good reason, right? I also loved having a sunroof. I decided then all my future cars would have a sunroof! In 2015 my husband felt it was a good idea for me to look for a new car. I only had two stipulations — an SUV and a sunroof.
I knew whatever car we bought would be the car my child would ride in, so I wanted one with enough room for all the stuff that goes along with having a baby.
But then we didn’t have a baby. And I kept driving that car.
It wasn’t overt. It’s not like I thought about it every time I got in my Terrain. But subconsciously I knew what that SUV was meant for, and I knew those expectations would never be met.
However, I just paid off the Terrain in April and I had no intention of having a car payment anytime soon. Except that it started doing some weird things and my husband was concerned those weird things might be costly things so maybe start thinking about getting a new car.
So I thought about it. I thought about what car would make me happy, or at least not give me a daily reminder of what I don’t have.
It wasn’t part of our Saturday plans, but we found a convertible and we bought it. I decided to say no to say yes. I said no to the SUV and all the expectations it held and I said yes to the convertible and all the possibilities it holds.
I’m still not really a car person, but oh my — this new thing brings me joy and releases stress and is just what I didn’t know I needed.
On Monday, I started the next course in my book writing efforts. I will actually begin writing now. Sample chapters, book proposals, query letters. It’s getting real!
And, I need more room in my life to see this dream come to fruition. I need to say no to say yes.
I made an announcement on my Quilting Moonbeams facebook page over the weekend: I’m not accepting orders for awhile, including Christmas. Although I don’t make a ton of money from this business, it does bring in a bit of extra cash. So, this is a small sacrifice, especially around Christmas when I get quite a few orders.
However, I can’t make quilts and spend time with my family and train for half marathons and go to yoga and work daily and see friends and walk the dogs daily AND write a book. It’s just not possible. Well, I mean, maybe it is, but I don’t think anyone would enjoy being around me, so let’s just say it’s not possible! And I really do enjoy sleeping 🙂
I have a feeling I may have to cut back on a few more things as well. I haven’t been to yoga regularly this summer and that feels okay. I’m still on track to run two half marathons this fall but they probably won’t be my fastest races and that feels okay too.
In the past these things wouldn’t have felt okay. I would have felt bad that I’m cutting back on my yoga practice and my support of the studio. I would have felt bad that I’m not following my training plan and missing a run or two each week. However, I know that saying no to those goals means I’m saying yes to another one, and that feels really good to me.
And, those are things I can pick back up again. This isn’t a forever “no” — more like, not right now. There are times when going to yoga multiple times a week is just what I need. There are times when pushing myself to achieve a PR is just what I need. There are times when maintaining a small business is just what I need. Those times aren’t right now, though.
It’s not easy to say no to say yes. It requires determination and accountability and letting go and focus.
Writing this book won’t and can’t be my whole life. There are too many other things I love to do. Plus, you know, that whole working full time thing. But, I can make a little extra room and so that’s what I’m doing.
I let go of the old car and all the dreams it held and now look at me sporting around in a cute little convertible. I never would have thought. But I let go and something new fell into place. I wonder what will fall into place next? I’m excited to see!
Have you ever had to let something go to make room for something new?
peace.
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Anne Brock 