Crash

I was about 75% done with a blog post on the topic failing when my computer crashed. The irony isn’t lost on me.

I might try to rewrite it later. I might not.

I don’t understand why out of the blue with no warning whatsoever my computer just turns off. I don’t understand why programs randomly shut down. I don’t understand how my computer was seemingly fine one day and then it wasn’t.

There are a lot of things I don’t understand. I don’t understand why some bodies work as directed and others don’t. I don’t understand why my computer decided that Excel needed to open just now even though it wasn’t open before the crash. I don’t understand why it was so warm in February and now it’s not. I don’t understand why some people are kind and others can be so cruel.

I’m sure I could understand these things intellectually. But I want to understand them in a deeper way. I want to understand in my soul.

Today I’m just going to accept that there are things I won’t understand (like how Adobe just popped up saying there was an error when Adobe wasn’t even open pre-crash). I’m going to be present and let things go. I’m not going to stress about my computer or the weather or my body, because apparently these are things I can’t control.

I will enjoy the sunshine and take advantage of a free Sunday afternoon. I will laugh and smile and pay attention to the little things.

Happy Sunday, friends.

peace.


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